Updated: Jan 13
Here's a question I recently received:
I have always based me being "good enough" at anything whether it be my job, my romantic relationships, or my parenting skills on what other people thought, instead of what I knew to be true. No matter what I do, I always feel like I'm a failure compared to others. What can I do stop feeling so lousy about myself and start feeling good enough?
Thank you Trish!
Believe it or not, I too have days where I feel like I'm not good enough, not smart enough, not successful enough. What has helped me tremendously are these 4 daily practices that I'd developed to help me overcome this feeling of "not being good enough" and to start appreciating myself more for all that I've achieved.
Learning through video is more your thing? No problem. Then check out the video below.
#1 YOU CAN'T HATE YOUR WAY INTO LOVING YOURSELF
Telling yourself, "You’re worthless and unlovable", what a failure you are, and how you are not living up to your fullest potential, won’t make you feel any more worthy, lovable or successful.
The simple fact is, the only way to achieve self-love and feel good enough is to love yourself—regardless of who you are and where you stand, even if you know there are things you want to change.
You are enough just as you are. Self-love will become a little bit easier every time you remind yourself of that.
#2 PROGRESS OVER PERFECTION
Focus on progress rather than perfection and on how far you’ve come rather than how far you have left to go.
One of the biggest causes of self-loathing is the hell-bent need to “get it right.” We strive for perfection and success, and when we fall short, we feel less than and worthless. What we don’t seem to realize is that working toward our goals and being willing to put ourselves out there are accomplishments within themselves, regardless of how many times we fail.
Instead of berating yourself for messing up and stumbling backward, give yourself a pat on the back for trying, making progress, and coming as far as you have.
Keep a Gratitude or Progress Journal. Note down on a regular basis your progress and achievements. Whenever you feel like you're not good enough or not achieving enough, look through the journal and be proud of how far you've come.
#3 SURROUND YOURSELF WITH PEOPLE WHO LOVE YOU
There are people who genuinely love you and will give you constructive advice and support to help you see through your challenges to get to where you want to be, then there are those that only know how to lecture you on all the ways you are not good enough or not trying hard enough, thinking that that's the best way to "help" you.
No matter how much confidence you may have in yourself, hearing constant negativity will only sink you down deeper into a dark hole of self-hate.
Call me cold-hearted if you will, however, if after I've tried many times to try and convey how they make me feel, but it gets me nowhere, then regardless of the form of connection I have to such a negative person, I have no hesitation to cut them out of my life.
Because a wise friend once told me that I am the only person who is responsible for my own mental well being. Not my family, not my friends, not anyone else but me.
Hence, if a person knowingly knows their words and actions are hurting me, but they choose not to try to change their ways and to continue to put me down, then I too can choose who I want and don't want in my life.
#4 TALENT VS SKILLS
Do you believe that in order to be successful, you need to be born naturally talented?
Talent is something you are born with, but skill is something you develop. 99% of what you need to succeed in golf are skills.
If you believe that you can only achieve your goals if you are "naturally" talented, then you are only hindering yourself from realizing your full potential.
However, if you can shift your beliefs to accept that no matter what you wish to achieve, with a good amount of dedication, persistence, and faith in yourself, you can learn new skills and you can conquer anything.
Once you’ve watched or read through this article, I’d love to hear from you.
What are the triggers that have made you feel not good enough and how did you overcome it? Do share your knowledge and experience in the comments below.
Share as much detail as you can. Many lovely souls come here for insight and inspiration. Your story may be just what someone else needs to have a major breakthrough.
I really hope these tips helped to remind you to overcome the feeling of not being good enough and to start realizing your full awesomeness 😘
Thank you so much for watching, sharing, and adding your thoughts. Now let go of your fears and know that there is always a choice.
Live strong, and have the courage to create a life you love because your happiness matters.
With SO much 💖,
P.S. Have a question you’d love to ask me? Do give me your Q on my page Ask Trish Anything and I'll personally get back to you with some empowering steps to help guide you through your challenges. I look forward to serve and help you towards a brighter future, a future you've always dreamt of. Do give me your Q here.
Knowing when to ask for help and guidance is not weakness. If anything, it's a strength.
P.P.S. **BOOKS I RECOMMEND TO HELP YOU LIVE A MINDFUL, THANKFUL, AND HAPPY LIFE**
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